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David Lynch Film Festival

My trio of David Lynch DVDs showed up today. LBB wants to watch with me, but she's tied up in all this Princess Diana that's going on today. So I may just go ahead and watch Wild At Heart.

The boy was completely insane tonight. Not in a wild way, but in a strange way. He suddenly decided he wants big muscles. He started doing push-ups and squats and many other exercises to buff up. His technique was almost perfect. I've done a few push-ups here and there, but I never noticed if he was watching. I'm not sure where this is coming from, and I'm not sure a six-year-old should be doing strength exercises, but hey, maybe he can motivate me!

So, between the films and mini-Jack LaLanne, I don't guess I'm getting to the website redesign tonight.

This night is lost.

Right now, though, after the crazy boy and the somewhat grumpy wife have turned in, I'm enjoying a mellow moment listening to America.

Nostalgia is quicksand. I have stuff to do, but dang it, Tin Man is a great tune.

Oh, and now Stevie Wonder just came on. Sir Duke, a classic. Oh, and next a bit of Joni Mitchell. Listen to the Hejira album and love the bass. Jaco Pastorius. One of a kind.

And thank you, it's finally raining. Yesterday for about ten minutes, and today over and over, for ten minutes at a time. It's something. It's helping. Let's see if the yard can transform from Rice-a-Roni golden brown to Ho-Ho-Ho Green Giant green.

Big Changes on the Way

I've decided, after my initial doubts, that I want to keep on blogging, ad infinitum. My traffic has increased steadily, as has my interest in writing. The site design has suffered some neglect, though. Basically, I set up the shell of the site back in February, and other than a few minor cosmetic rearrangements and sidebar additions, it's remained the same.

"It's time to change, to rearrange, " screeched Peter Brady.

A month or so ago, I started experimenting with some things I'd like to do, and I found Blogger lacking in flexibility. This weekend, I'm hoping to switch over to Wordpress.

I'm guessing the whole JSR experience will be quite different once I'm through. And yes, it's about time I ho' myself out with some ads. Neal Peart said you can't get something for nothing. But it would be nice to get a little something for something - other than everyone's loyal readership, which is it's own reward. Thank you! Wish me luck.

Of course, these plans may change radically, because I have not one, not two, but three David Lynch movies en route from Amazon. Two I haven't seen yet: Lost Highway and the latest one, Inland Empire. These are parts one and three of a loose trilogy, sandwiching Mulholland Drive, which was fantastic. I also ordered Wild At Heart, which I've seen. I didn't love it, but I'm rounding out the collection.

So, if they get here, I may be too freaked out by these movies to accomplish anything productive.

$4K For The Top Of His Head?

This poor fella had the top of his head shrivel up in a faulty fridge while he had brain surgery. Can you imagine? He was compensated the equivalent of $4,100.

I'm no fan of outrageous settlements for medical errors. Mistakes happen. Still, it seems to me $4,100 is rather weak for someone who has to wear a bowl on his head for the rest of his life.

Tag, You're Out!

For crying out loud. This school decided it caused conflict to allow children to play tag on the playground. They are still allowed to play "running games" as long as they don't "chase each other".

Explain what those running games might be. Seems to me, if kids are playing running games, they are likely to chase each other, unless they are having running races. Well that will be the next to go, because you certainly don't want any of the children to lose a race. It might damage their weak little self-esteem.

This is just another example of adults hovering over kids and micromanaging everything they do.

I call BS! If a kid is being chased against his or her will, there's a simple three step process to put an end to it:
#1) Ask politely that the chaser stop. (We just added this option in the last 20 years or so.)
#2) Retaliate. Try reciprocal chasing, clever name-calling, threats, or stopping suddenly in mid-flight so the chaser runs square into your back and busts his nose. Or how about this obvious solution: don't run away. Shouldn't that put a quick end to the chase?
#3) Tattle.

I bet the staff at this school never let this process work through. They nipped it in the bud by ending the fun for everyone before step 1. Either that, or there is a contingent of whiners that relied too heavily on option #3 and the teachers got sick of dealing with it.

Pshaw! I say fiddlesticks. We need to give kids a chance to learn creative play on their own. This includes all the negotiation, euphoria, and disappointment that goes along with playing a game. You win some, you lose some. If you lose, you come back and try harder next time. If a child opts out of certain games, no problem. If he opts out of everything, there are probably other issues going on.

If someone is cheating, let the kids figure out on their own that it's no fun to play with a cheater. Let these things play themselves out and eventually, you will find the cheater has fewer and fewer playmates. He might learn something from that. Interfere and the learning process breaks down before it even gets started.

No more tag on the playground? Nonsense! It's no wonder kids are getting chubby. The only time we leave them alone is when they are playing video games.

Brownie Points For My Boy

Monday night LBB hosted her book club at our house, which was a cue for TB and I to get the hell out.

He had soccer until 6:30, so after a quick change of clothes we headed out to the local hangout for dinner. Then we took a walk around the neighborhood for awhile. After that, of course the boy wanted a Slurpee. Sucker that I am, especially when it's just the two of us out on the town, I caved and took him to get one.

As we were leaving 7-11, which is right next to the local hangout, a trio of extremely attractive 20-something women were walking to the restaurant. Two had long blond hair. While I would not say they were working it, exactly, they were all dressed in that casual, summer way that you just can't ignore, if you are a dirty old man like me. I love summer.

Anyway, TB noticed me as I noticed them. They were maybe 40 feet away, and had their backs to us at this point, and here is where he banked some brownie points: "Daddy, who is that? Is that Momma?"

Well, then! Considering that his Momma is about twice their age, I knew this would be a winner. I was right. When we got home, I told her (and the rest of the book club) what he said, and there was a lot of, "Aww, cute!" and a big hug from LBB. I let him stay up an extra half hour to watch baseball with me that night.

Now that he's long past the toddler torture, having a "guys night" with my son is getting to be a lot of fun.

Weekend: Diet Killer

I was doing so well. Down six pounds as of Friday. Well, I negated all that progress over the weekend, because at one point Sunday, I was right back near my starting weight. I didn't count that, though. I'm trying to control for midday fluctuations by making the pre-breakfast weigh-in the official measurement.

So, as of Monday AM, I'm down a total of a pound and a half. Clearly, I'll have to be more food conscious on the weekends. I hate that.

Bite Me, Too

Kate is in a foul mood, and so am I. So it's a great time to say, "Bite me!"

I had some fun stuff from the weekend to tell you about, but I'm too sour right now for fun. Maybe tomorrow.

Dry, Dry, Dry

TB had a huge day yesterday that didn't end until after 10PM, so he slept late, until 9:00 and beyond. We enjoyed the extra sleep, also. At one point, early in the morning I heard some thunder. Thank goodness! They were calling for the chance of a stormy day, and good god, we need it here in SW VA. Our lawn is gone. If you chucked a lit match on it, I think it would catch and smolder for days. I haven't mowed the whole yard in a month. I call that a drought.

Once we got up, yes it was cloudy and a little misty. Around 10:30 or so, it started showering steadily, like we haven't seen in at least a month. Yes! Then, after about 10 minutes or so, done. The rest of the day, the sun slowly wiped the clouds away, and once again we are bathed in sunny heat. At least it's only upper 80's today, instead of upper 90's, but still I wish it would rain, rain, rain.

Naive Blogger, Baiting Traffic

I've been a'blog since January. My traffic has steadily increased, from zero to 20 or 30 visitors a day - wheee! Still, I'm intrigued by the forces that drive blog traffic. Yes, I know, interesting content is a good start. I can tell that I've hit a homer a time or two, and struck out many, many times.

Here's the thing, though: a few days ago I posted a link to a goofy picture of the South Park guys and suddenly my traffic has gone through the roof. I'm not sure why that picture was such a draw, so I thought I would experiment a bit.

I'm curious if this picture of breasts will entice anyone; or maybe these thighs, or this pecker.

I'm just playing around, so if you've been lured here against your wishes, welcome! Have fun, and vote in the mini polls on the left sidebar, because they are about to be retired for good. Not enough response to be statistically significant, revealing, or interesting in even the smallest little way.

200

Post #200, just for it's own sake, since January 24. That's 200 posts in 211 days. Many of them expendable nonsense, but not a bad start, I would say.

Portobello and Tomato Sandwich

When I got home from the gym, there was a sack of tomatoes on the kitchen floor but no sign of my family. They had gone to the pool. So, now my portobello mushroom quandry is solved. Portobello and tomato sandwiches, with the leftovers of last night's couscous salad. What could be easier?

Sounds pretty good, but I still can't wait for a giant bowl of pasta or a big juicy burger this weekend.

Crushing Disappointment

I'm on day four of healthy living. I haven't killed anyone yet, but I am a bit cranky. Earlier, I was thirsty and craving some water, so I went to the break room and hit the Dasani button. Out shot a Cherry Coca-Cola One. That is not what I had in mind at all. There were a few people in there, and I let them know I wasn't happy. They just looked at me.

I'm not a water snob. Ordinarily, I have no problem using the water fountain in the hallway, but today there was a wadded up tissue laid up on it. Yuck. I think I'm the only one in the building that uses the fountain anymore. It's always bone dry when I use it.

I know, I know, a fountain is supposed to be awash with bacteria, but if I'm the only one using it, how dirty can it be?

So, I'm a bit hungry these days. I've been eating sensibly - except for a couple cold ones at the pool last night - and I'm keeping track. A light breakfast, turkey sandwiches with mustard instead of mayo for lunch, reasonable low fat dinner. Last night, I announced to my wife that the diet could "suck me", but I ended up making a couscous and tomato salad anyway. It was OK. My best guess, I've been averaging about 1400 calories a day.

Tonight, we are going to do something with portabella mushrooms, but I don't know yet what it will be. I'm going to hit the gym after work.

I went running last night, although it was a very short run while my son had soccer practice. While there, LBB called and said she was at the pool, so we went over there. Of course everyone was clinking it up, so I had to have a beer or two. Empty calories, but I was parched after my run, and boy did it taste good.

I'm not going to be a martyr to my diet over the weekend, but there are a few things I'm planning that should help. First, TB and I have been ordered out of the house Saturday morning so LBB can clean. (Bye, bye, now!) We are going to go for a hike, weather permitting. That will burn a few. Also, on the weekends, I often eat a big lunch, so I'll skip the second sandwich and fill in with some veggie snacks.

At some point though, before the weekend is over, I want a senseless meal, a major overindulgence. I'm going to grub it out. Then Monday back to the new healthy routine.

So far, I'm down 5 pounds. I know the first 10 are easy and then you level off, but it's encouraging and I'm determined to make my goal.

Vacation

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Bears + Beers = Bad

My wife sent this to me because I like beer and I joke sometimes, when asked where someone is, that they "Got 'et by a bear."

Ryan Seacrest to Host Yet Another Thing

Looks like Ryan Seacrest is going to host the Emmy Awards. Why don't we just put an end to the speculation and ask him to host everything from here on out? He's got Idol and American Top 40 on the radio. He has hosted dozens of award shows, pageants, red carpet galas, and any other Hollywood extravaganza that you can imagine. Just give him the job for everything.

Send Whoopi, Regis, Conan and Billy Crystal down to the second tier. Jon Stewart, Chris Rock, and Ellen DeGeneres: there's a ribbon cutting ceremony down at the new Lincoln Mercury dealership in San Bernardino. Better get going, they need an MC.

Ryan gets the big jobs now, but why? I don't get it. Clearly he's riding the wave of American Idol, but he is certainly not the reason people tune in.

I don't care for award shows, overall. I'm glad we've gotten past the days of uncomfortable forced banter between the presenters or "Fartman" drifting down from the rafters. Still, there's nobody more innocuous than Ryan Seacrest, so any shock factor will have to come from the presenters and the acceptance speeches.

Maybe Colbert was crossed off the list after he skewered the President last year. I'll tell you who should host if they really want to make an awards show into a big fun mess: Trey Parker and Matt Stone from South Park. That would be worth watching.